It took me a while to figure this out but what I want is someone who likes me- likes talking to, being with, hanging around me- so much that they accept my endless flaws. I want that same someone to love me so much that they, on the bad days and the worst when my flaws come rushing out, will remember why it is they like me.
It was 7:15 p.m. on a Wednesday night when I met her and curiosity consumed me.
I needed to know everything she was or wasn’t; everything she liked and loathed. What made her smile so I could do whatever it was endlessly.
What was her favorite book? Why? Did she read it every Christmas or was once enough for a lifetime?
Was she a coffee drinker? Or did she prefer tea? Was she close to her family?
What was her idea of vacation? Beach? Mountain? Netflix and wine on a Saturday night?
Does she sleep on her left? Her right? In the fetal position? Was she a morning person or a night owl? Or was she a strict 11:30 a,m, type of girl?
Did she like her martini shaken or stirred or did that only apply to chocolate milk?
What was that one song she blared when her day had gone to shit and she needed to find happiness and what was in the glass she was holding when she listened to it?
Did she tie her shoes with bunny ears or does the rabbit slip through the fence hole?
Did she cry when she was sad or was that only when she’s angry?
More than anything, I needed to know why no one else seemed to be questioning those things. How could no one else wonder about her? I couldn’t imagine it being possible because by 7:21 p.m. on that Wednesday night, I knew only that I knew nothing and the only thing I wanted to learn, the only thing in this world worth knowing, was her.